So I can't say for sure what suddenly struck me today that lead me to go look up my old blog. I haven't thought about it in ages, and couldn't even remember the last time I posted anything to it (thankfully blogger informed me it's been about 5 years, so I can wonder no more). I have had many times over the past years that I have wished I had someone to talk to about this or that, or even considered just writing my feelings down for myself only, but never did, or if I started, I got distracted and never finished. But for some reason I thought of this today, a day where I'm not sad, or stressed really, a day that's just about like any other day in my somewhat non conventional life, but a day where I felt inspired to talk about something that had been on my mind the past week or so. If no one ever sees this, that'll be just fine, but I thought hey, why not clear the cobwebs off the old blog. So here goes.
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Just after saying that, my dad called me to see if I wanted to watch a show with him while he ate... whatever meal comes at 2pm... so we can see how the whole distraction thing has happened in the past. Anyway, here goes, take 2.
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So as most who know me already knows, I have been overweight most of my life. Sure I was a skinny active kid as so many of us start, but by age 10 or so I was packing on the pounds. No big surprise, both of my parents have been overweight my whole life, so my eating and activity role models weren't the best. Do I blame them, absolutely not, but it does give a foundation to why I am the way I am. Like mom, I've done some dieting here and there, but never for very long, and unlike her, I've never really had much success only to end up putting it all back on plus some. I think the most I've ever lost was about 25 pounds, but to be honest, I'm not even sure about that. After my last attempt, which lasted about 3 months, I was ready to do what Mom did years ago and throw in the towel. Not because I didn't want to get healthier, but because I didn't want to keep getting fatter by trying and failing again and again. There is science to show that every time you lose weight and end up putting it back on, the body seems to add a few pounds, just to be safe. Wouldn't want to run out of fuel if I suddenly decided to start starving it of that nice 4000 calorie diet it's so fond of.
So until recently the most I was trying to do in the way of being healthier was getting my water in daily, and trying to get more veggies worked into my meals. That last one has always been a sticking point for me as there are very few ways I actually enjoy vegetables, and most of them involve adding some form of sugar or fat. I don't love the water thing either, I'd much rather be throwing back real sugar soda's (the southerner in me wants to say coke's so bad, but at least I'm not saying pop) all day then even look at plain, ol, boring water. But I have conditioned myself to reach for a bottle of water before a sugary substitute about 80% of the time, which is something at least.
Check back tomorrow for Part 2
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